Author, Speaker & Mental Health Advocate:  Jocelyn Bystrom

"Be the main character in your story, not every story needs to be written alone."

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                   Jocelyn’s Tips for Self-Advocacy / Peer Support

 

Regarding Suicide Prevention

 

***All views expressed here are my own. Please always consult your doctor and/or trusted individuals that support your mental health and well-being.

 

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Are you struggling in silence, having thoughts about, or planning to kill yourself?  

Let's create a brave space to talk about suicide.  

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Helpful questions:  

• How are you doing? 

• Are you thinking about killing yourself?

• What does that look like for you? (Try to find out what's happening that makes them feel like that?)

• Can we have a chat about it?

• Do you want to be dead, or would you like something in your life to change?

• May I share something about my personal experience? (If they say no, respect their no.)

• How's that working for you?

• Do you want to explore other things?

• Do you want to do something about it?

• Do you know how to get the help you need or can I help you find support and resources, you can reach out to?

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Helpful actions:

• Break the Silence,

• Create brave spaces: Provide unbiased support and come alongside your friend with curiosity to listen and explore what they are telling you and support with informed choice and resources.

• Listen to what isn't said,

• Support self-determination and choice!  

• Trust and cultivate feedback, share power (communicate with authenticity and transparency) to ensure accountability, and be human (have the courage to be vulnerable).

• Pull away from understanding the diagnosis.

• Remember its not about fix and solve, instead listen with curiosity!

• See the person holistically; although you're experiencing different paths, and separate identities.

• Be willing to sit in the discomfort with empathy, and connection.

• Let them be the voice of the discussion.

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Helpful comments:  

• Don't say: "I understand."  Instead, say: I'm curious, and I care, which offer relatability, hope and recoverability.

• I've never experienced that. What's that like for you? 

• I really want to be with you and explore what's going on for you with curiosity.

• Do you want to do something about it?

• I come without an agenda to be with you.

• I know others who have been able to get through this.

• Can I stay with you while you call the suicide hotline? Encourage them to seek supports they choose.

• Can I stay with your and call the suicide hotline for you? Go alongside as they seek supports.

• I need to tell you, I have to to report this, if you don't. ***Tell them, be really honest and open, before your report. Give them the opportunity for self-determination and to seek support for themselves. 

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